Dear Author,
I definitely understand your take on abortion and women rights in your blog "Dear Government, can I leave my house today?" posted in A Citizen's Post and must say that I agree with some of what was stated. This is a very controversial and touchy subject for me so I will not agree or disagree with the government's take on abortion. Therefore, I have decided to actually comment on the writing itself as too the validity of the argument and your ability to reach an array of readers.
Although there were many expressions of disagreement; there was no evidence as to why you feel the way you do besides maybe; personal feelings. I feel that there was no embedded link within the article to support what decides your take on the infringement of women's rights. What make you think that the government is trying to control your body if they are trying to protect the life of another? That is a question I would like to gain the answer to. Your explanation of a citizen's right to privacy was highly demonstrated but with a very biased attitude with an emotional feel the audience can immediately pick up on.
Reading your statements, it appeared that your experience in life which is one of a personal aspect reflected in the voice of the writing. The audience should be allowed to understand your angle with documented proof of the governments affect on an individual's life when mandating a law to hinder the right to privacy. An added link to Roe vs. Wade could help to support your argument. Too help assure or maintain your audience's attention, your blog should also be edited before posting. There are a few punctuation errors, fragments, and run on sentences that can be distracting may take away the audience's focus. Overall it was a good post and I can clearly pick up your voice on citizen's rights.
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